One Day at a Time - 5 Things to Remember on Your Journey Through Change!

"They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself." - Andy Warhol.

The most important changes we need to make often arise from our most difficult decisions. The path that brings us to the clearing of choice in the forest of life is often rocky and rough. When we get to this daunting open space, branching off to different options in our life, we get scared. Change is scary. It is an active decision rather than a passive existence. We most likely will have to push against the inertia of old habits (either our own or our social group) and thoughts. Change is an uphill battle in most situations. But it doesn't have to be unpleasant.


Here are 5 things that will help us on your journeys through change, whatever your changes may be!

1) Commitment: By understanding that changes require a commitment to ourselves, and readying ourselves for any obstacles that may come our way, or for any opposition by others to our decisions, we will place ourselves in a good position to follow-through on our plans for change. When we don't commit to change, we are only letting ourselves down. Remember this, and be accountable to you!

2) Perseverance: If you hold this tool in your emotional arsenal, you will never be without a defense. Perseverance is key to ensuring the changes you want to make in your life will materialize. Perseverance is most valuable when we struggle with maintaining our new habits or way of living. Visualizing your end-goal, and what you really want your life to be like is what fuels perseverance. On average it takes a smoker 7 attempts until they finally quit*. That's on average! This means there are some people for whom the number may be closer to 10, and some for whom it may be much less than 7. Knowing yourself, and staying true to your goals is what will help push you through difficult periods during change!

3) Visualization: I mentioned it in a previous point, but it bears repeating. If you can't keep the carrot-on-the-stick in sight, you will lose motivation. Since most changes are not tangible (quitting smoking, learning a new skill, moving out for the first time, leaving a toxic relationship), we need to visualize our new selves, and our new lives that our changes will bring us. Visualize yourself finally being free of the patterns and habits you've practiced over the years, and embracing healthier ones. If your goal is to lose weight and practice healthy eating, visualize and really feel what it will be like to be the healthier you. Whatever your goal and your reason for change, visualize the outcome.  

Visualize your success and take it.

4) Breathe! Remember, this is a marathon, not a sprint. Take some time to be mindful, breathe properly and center yourself before burning out. An often-used and well-known cliché term, "Rome wasn't built in a day" also applies to personal change; it won't happen overnight. On average, it takes roughly 66 days to form a new habit.* Depending on the magnitude and type of change you aim to be making, adjust this to anywhere between a few weeks and a few months (even upwards of 8 months!).
Now, if your goal is to increase the amount of water you're drinking per day, or throwing in a bit of exercise everyday, the amount of time to automate this as part of your routine will be less than changing lifelong habits (such as the types, amounts and timing of the food you eat, for example).
With all change, however, the point is to remember: it takes time, and be patient with yourself! You will get there if you want it bad enough!

5) Seek support: Friends and family are automatic go-tos when we need support, so why not lean on them when you need some help during your period of change? Chances are they will be encouraging, and may even want to enact some change in their own lives! You might serve as inspiration for them! Being able to support each other will go along way to ensuring each of you meet your goals. If friends and family as a support-network are not options, consider joining a group in your community. If you are aiming for weight-loss, for example, join or start a walking or running group, or join classes at the local gym. Whatever works for you is best! If you are planning relationship/personal-changes, meet with a counselor specific to your interests and go from there. Also, career-fairs and informational sessions are very helpful when planning a change in your career. A certified career-counselor will also be able to assist you on your journey.

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Other topics you may be interested in: 

 Setting Goals

 What motivates you?

Engine for Change - Motivation for self-relection and self-improvement. 

A Journey of a Thousand Miles Begins with a Single Step

Overwhelmed? Carve a staircase out of a wall!

* Information from HealthBC
*  Lally, P., van Jaarsveld, C. H. M., Potts, H. W. W. and Wardle, J. (2010), How are habits formed: Modelling habit formation in the real world. Eur. J. Soc. Psychol., 40: 998–1009. doi: 10.1002/ejsp.674

What motivates you?

Hey Conquerors!

I wanted to discuss the topic of motivation and let you tell me what motivates you to do the things you do.

I actually started writing this particular blog a couple of months ago, but got side-tracked by life.

Today I submitted an application for a prestigious national scholarship award. It has taken weeks to get it prepared and I spent 9 hours today, grueling over the smallest details, to make it perfect. Motivation was hard, but I felt let down this morning when I inadvertently missed a deadline for something else that was much less important. Still the feeling was negative. I felt angry at myself, and upset - sad that I missed out on an opportunity (to win extra tickets to a show in the States!).

So my motivation to get my application done before the due date (tomorrow!) was negatively influenced as well as positively influenced... I felt the negative side of missing a deadline for something already and knew that if I missed this deadline, I would feel much worse.
The thought of how proud I would feel, or how excited I would feel if I won the award motivated me to ignore all the potential distractions waiting for me on the internet.
I am just proud of the fact that I got the application completed and submitted. It required a very detailed, thorough research proposal supported by literature as well as reference letters. I had to be organized, and efficient in order to get it done. I did it though, my internal and external motivating factors helped me get it done, and I am feeling good about it.


The things that motivate me in my life and in striving for my goals (which are numerous) include:

Success - completing my goals is an intrinsic motivating factor for me; also being recognized by leaders in the fields I take interest in is an extrinsic motivating factor for me.

Creativity - I am motivated to create and share (music, writing, etc.). I would say my drive to create is mostly intrinsic, though it does feel good to be acknowledged or complimented on your creations.

Growth - I am motivated to grow into my best potential self, learning everything and anything I can about the things I love or take deep interest in. I want to be the best at the things I do, or at least *my* best.

Fixing/Troubleshooting - I can't stand when things break or don't work. I need to know why/how and then fix them.

Those are just a few things I can think of right now.

What motivates you? Tell me in the comments form! :)



  If you enjoyed this post, subscribe to Conquer The Clouds


Other topics you may be interested in:

Engine for Change - Motivation for self-relection and self-improvement.


Motivating and encouraging statements - Help yourself stay above the water!





Conquer on!

Weekly Challenge 5 - Week of January 15 – 21

Welcome back everyone and welcome to the 5^th weekly challenge!!

ConquerTheClouds has officially entered the 6^th week of existence!

I hope you were able to keep up with the Challenge last week of tracking your moods. If you haven’t been following the Challenges, check out this page for a list of what you’ve been missing out on!

This week, I have come up with a creative-challenge (aren’t they all creative? haha!).

I have been thinking about my future and career-goals and want to make them accessible and manageable. As I have mentioned in Staying Motivated when Discouraged (tip # 3) and in Carving a Staircase out of a Wall in order to set manageable goals we have to chunk them into smaller steps. We can call this prioritizing, as well. This is to help stay motivated and avoid getting discouraged from being unable to complete the entire project or goal all at once. We have to make sure things are time-appropriate.

So, with that! I want everyone to write out a couple big goals (buy a car, go to university, write a song or story, get a job, lose 10 lbs, etc.) and put them onto a flash card, or a medium-sized piece of paper. Colour it with funky colours, or make it fun however you like – this is an important, fulfilling goal of yours! Make it fun!

On separate pieces of paper (smaller if you like, like half sized flash cards – cut them with scissors) write at least 3-5 steps that you can take to make it to your big goal. Make them manageable, and attainable.

Imagine you are trying to get a job. Write that on your card “Get a Job”. On the 1^st little paper we can write “write my resume”, on the 2^nd we can write “write my cover letter” and so on. These are much easier to manage than thinking about just getting that job and all that entails!

For me, this week, I am going to write my goals on some flash card sized papers and tape them to my bathroom mirror (or on a wall or door I see every day). I want you to do the same. Tape your goals to a surface that you see often. This will help to refocus your mind if you find it difficult to concentrate, and also provide you with motivation to complete your goals.

If you have no goals for your life at this point, this week can be for brainstorming! Make it fun and wacky as well as serious as your write down your life goals – you can put things like 'having a dinosaur-shaped pool in your backyard by the time you’re 30' as well as 'becoming a doctor'. It doesn’t always have to be serious, but having well-defined, attainable goals for life are important as they provide a sense of purpose and let you feel satisfied and fulfilled.

Now, get to it! :D

If you haven’t been following the Weekly Challenges, start here today!

Thanks for reading!

                                                    Conquer on!

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